Greatful

 
Although I may complain that there certainly are not enough hours in the day to be super mom/wife/daughter/sister/friend. I am greatful to have those busy hours spent with the ones I love. Tonight we played photo shoot while listening to records and dancing... simple joys. Mike got to bust out some old favorites while I snap, snap, snapped photos. Delilah spun wildly.. Cecilia laughed...we all sang.. It was a wonderful way to spend our Friday evening. (Now on to that "to do" list...)

Delilahisms...

They couldn't be more different. Even from the womb. Delilah my "head down ready `to rock and roll" baby to Cecilia my "lets do summersaults up until the last minute breech" baby. One blonde, the other bruntette. One loud, one soft.

I often wonder if my toddlers wise ways lately will rub off on her sister. Is this her personality? Or is this who she is? A manipulating comedian who begged through her baby monitor to "Go potty PLEASE!! PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE". This was at 10:30 at night. She should have been slumbering. But instead she tried to find anyway to get out of her princess bed. Did I mention she wants nothing to do with a potty during the day? Spouting tears and shouting " I don't WANNA!" until her face turns red, should you mention "potty".

Yes, this is our little sassy one. She has been heard using the phrase "dam-it" in the most appropriate way.

"Delilah, your shoe is untied"
"Dam-it!"

And then she will look at me with these sly little eyes. Wondering of she has gotten away with such a mouth, or maybe she is looking for the reaction? Either way, my own trucker mouth has permenant tape on it.

I wonder what Cecilia will be like. Could she follow in her punch drunk comedian sisters footsteps.

Or will she remain soft and reserved and sensitive. Cooing at what is silly, sensitive when things go haywire.

These two may look and act very different, but a few things are for certain. They are beautiful gifts from god. They complete me. They are everything I ever prayed for and then some. They are beautiful and together they are ours. Our two beautiful (and silly) babys!

the tale that never fades

Tonight I took both of them for a walk in that tremendous double stroller. Our destination was the convience store, a mile away to the free air station, to fill the strollers tires. This meant a very long trek for Delilah especially.

I laced up my sneakers and placed both sleepwear clad little ones in the deluxe stroller. Delilah insited on bringing her babydoll, which she also insisted should be naked. So off went her clothes.
On our walk we chatted about the things we saw, a white house, a red car. The things we heard, a motorcycle, a dog barking. She would ask a question and I would answer and so on

When we arrived at the air pump at the convience store, I started to fill the tires. Delilah had never been this close to a air compressor before and the loud hissing noise startled her.

"Whats dat mommy?"

"Its an air hose" I reply, as I finish one tire and move to the next,

"Whats dat mommy?"

I realize that she has no concept of what an air hose is, or why I am inflating my tires.

"Honey, you know when daddy put air in your pool toys at Bobbie and Hat's house?"

I wait for a response. Nothing.

"Remember when daddy put his mouth on your floaty mat and blew air inside to make it float?"

"His mowff?"

"Yes, well that is kind of what Mommy is doing with this hose."
What an aweful analagy, but she stopped asking questions, so I figured maybe she understood. Who was I kidding, she wasn't even two.

On the way home Delilah pointed out something that she hadn't noticed on the way home.
"Little House!" she yelled. "Mommy little house!"
She was so excited to point out a little shed for sale. It didn't look much like a house. It really was just a small tool shed. Maybe you could fit a lawn mower in it. I opened my mouth to correct her and explain the purpose of a shed. Instead I just agreed with her.
"Yes Delilah, a little house." Then I surpised myself "Do you know who lives there?"
Even though she was seated in the stroller I could catch her profile as she was gazing at the "little house". Her eyes her filled with wonder. I could tell that her mind was racing. Who could possibly live there?
"The Three Bears" I said answering myself, satisfied that I hadn't ruined her childhood wonder or imagination.

Insecurities vs. Innocence

.
"Diff one for you mommy?" she said sweetly handing me an empty plate.

"mmm Delilah, that was yummy"

"Diff one for you too mommy. I bake you cookies?" she asks looking for reassurance.

"mmmm... yes, you did! That was delicious" I exclaim, placing another empty plate between the mound of laundry before me.

"Mommy, you cook too?" she asks, pulling my hand toward her play kitchen.

I look at the laundry, half folded. Sigh.

"I'll be right there." I say, as I grab another bath towel.

She walks over to plastic kitchen. Its one whole unit. A microwave,refrigerator, stove, dishwasher a sink. Even a little window over the sink. All combined into one compact area, for little hands to maneuver and little minds to imagine. I am secretly envious of all of its features. And for a second ponder what it would be like to only have to clean such a tiny kitchen. Sigh.

"You comin' mommy?"

I put my half folded towel down and approach the tiny kitchen. I sit on the floor beside her. For the next ten minutes we make soup and cookies. She tells me what to do, I listen. I peek in the kitchen window and ask for a sandwich. I watch her little body shuffle from sink to stove, dishwasher to refrigerator. She closes one door and opens another. Through the window she hands me a an empty plate.

"Here cow" she says.

I am baffled. Did my almost two year old daughter just call me a cow? Really?

"What sweetie?" I ask, trying not to sound alarmed.

"Here. Cow."

Doesn't she know I just had a baby? That all of this flab in front is extra baby- Wait! Who am I kidding, its always been there. Does she even know what it means to call someone a cow? In disbelief I ask again.

"Here cow, here baby cow"

Baby Cow? Baby Cow why is she now calling me a baby cow?

Then I smile, realizing her innocence.

"Yes! Mommy is a baby cow!"


Our trip to the farm last week proved educational. We visited some calfs who were in a pen behind a grid like fence. It dawned on me that through the gridded kitchen window of this play kitchen, that I too, must appear to be a baby cow! I absolutley love this childs imagination.

Girls Day Out

Last week I took both girls to "the city" (aka: Albany) for the first time. Feeling adventurous and a little insane, we ventured out with little expectations of actually accomplishing anything at all. (Disclaimer: wish full thinking told me to go to giant baby store, pick up necessities, then grab lunch at the mega mall food court. Following this mayhem my plan was that both babies would take a two hour nap while I, cool mama pushed them and leisurely shopped.) Things didn't exactly go that way, however I did learn a thing or two about having two children under the age of two and still trying to feel like you have it all together.

- Nursing your 3 week old and trying to entertain a 21 month old in a public "nursing room" isn't that hard. Talking about the different colors and shapes on the walls was the topic of conversation for a while. Keeping the toddler from knocking over a decorative lamp and trying to keep her from eating stray animal crackers off the floor proved to be a struggle when the conversation got boring.

-A double jogger stroller (side by side style) is a necessity. But it has its faults. Like, you cannot maneuver it between the sea of cars in the mega mall parking lot. Instead, walking around the entire lot is the only way in... or out.

- Double jogger stroller does not fit in the bathroom handicap stall. Relying on the kind smile of a stranger to watch your children and allow you to void proved successful. This can be done if you can trust your instincts. Thank goodness mine were right on.

-purchasing said kind stranger lunch when you bump into her in the food court line again, is a way to instill good karma. It also earned more points, and said stranger carried our lunch tray to our eating destination.

- Order yourself a salad. Being postpatum you feel skinnier just looking at it.

- choosing an eating destination in a large food court is necessary, should the need to whip out big lefty (or little righty) to feed your newborn. I chose far away and secluded, for nursing privacy.

- getting a toddler settled in her seat while spreading out her lunch (laying out napkins to cover the table surface, dumping chicken tenders on them, poking straw through drink.. etc) and keeping a careful eye on the teeny tiny body lying in a gigantic stroller are no big feat. Eating your salad with your fingers because you forgot a fork is.... and attemping to pack up the troops to get one would prove disasterous. Don't forget a fork!

-Double jogger stroller does not fit in popular chain department store "family restroom". Changing diapers in the common area of the mall near the greenery seems to work well.

- whipping out big lefty behind a pillar near the greenery works well for privacy.

- keep diaper bag securely closed while doing this. Toddlers seem to have a grand time strewing out all of your belongings around this feeding area and poking you in the eyes with sunglasses. Repeatedly.

- make sure newborn is really hungry when doing this. Otherwise, you just end up with an embarrassing wet leg, crotch to knee.

- deciding when its time to leave is crucial to avoid stares and sympathetic "been there" smiles. A good time would be when both occupants of the double stroller are wailing at the top of their lungs and your leg is soaking wet.

- when you think its time to exit, just give it 5 more minutes. As after packing up the stroller and putting child number 1 in her car seat, and settling to feed child number 2 in front seat.... child number 1 immediately falls asleep and child number 2 satisfy her hunger.

I never got that two hour of mommy time shopping, but I did enjoy the first of many shopping trips with my two girls. The bumps in the road I viewed as lessons for myself. Lessons that have taught me to roll with the punches. Lessons that maybe someday I can teach them.

It has been a while now, since I have put my thoughts in writing. I have dabbled here and there with journaling, but for some reason I have found myself distracted by social networking. So, the hand written journal has taken a backburner. I have needed to do this for a long time, get caught up on myself. Pay closer attention to my family. I figure that there is no time like the present to start documenting and sharing some of the best years of my life.... and so here we go, the adventures of One Aquarius Mama.